Stanbrooke Today
May my epitaph read:  "He loved kids"
2011 Staff poem
For the new in past two years, know that this a bit of tradition.  Skipped last year while Pat was so sick.   This year has been tougher than usual but did manage to put something together.
My sense of humor tends toward sarcasm and a bit attacking at times – maybe a bit more this year than usual.
I do love you, remember that
Just a few comments on the year – laugh with not just at; wait and most will have their turn.
Not good poetry, no real subtle messages,  just craziness
All based on actual happenings – may exaggerate a LITTLE.
Thick skin – nothing completely off limits if happened.
Some “inside” stuff not all understand.  Sorry for that but no solution.
No way to mention everyone, or give equal time, grown so large.  Some may be glad for this.  Some just mentioned, some dorky enough to be our stars. If not mentioned probably because not done anything too stupid or outrageous, at least that we found out about this year.
Nothing out of this room, please – don’t expect to hear about poem next week.
If don’t have a really good sense of humor and can laugh at yourself about anything, better take a break outside until this is over.
Another year has passed us by
                 It’s been a wild one too
While many things happened at the school
                At the church there was a coup.
Bro. Matey went too far
                In ways so hard to miss
Fortunately,  it only took the church men
                Three years to realize this.
No secret I was on his list
                I had to go, he said
And there were quite a few others
                Who followed as he led.
He did everything but pack my bags
                To be sure that I would leave
But, here I am with poem in hand
                With at least a short reprieve.
Doug survived the changing guard
                Stayed behind the scenes all year
We know what you’re thinking, but really
                There’s nothing suspicious here.
It  probably would have been better, though
                And raised eyebrows less, no doubt
If Doug hadn’t been in measuring Matey’s office
                A week before they threw him out.
It was a bit unseemly though
                As Matey packed up to be gone
Doug was leading a pep rally
                On the front church lawn.
Doug  became the “interim” pastor
                To give the appearance of being fair
Of course, the whole process had as much suspense
                As wondering if Mrs. Stringer dyes her  hair.
Before we judge Doug very much
                Best go a little slow
He’s still deciding day by day
                If he’s dictator or CEO.
Doug’s a great preacher all will say
                Who’ve ever heard him speak
But, there’s trouble if his sermons keep
                Getting 5 minutes longer every week.
He’s got a lot to say, he says
                Has to get in all important tenets
Would someone please remind him the Sermon on the Mount
                Only took ten minutes.
But all in all things go on
                And seem to be alright
But, there are a few times we still pray
                Doug’s not just “Matey Lite”
Typical Day
A  typical day at TCS
                This is how it goes.
The seniors are outside selling tickets
                Just what for no one knows.
Kem's in the gym selling Breakfast
                Burritos to Mexican kids
They taste her fare and aren't too sure
                She knows what a burrito is.
But let’s not forget as you picture this
                We are talking here about our Kem
So, if these kids really value their lives
                They’d blame sure better like ‘em.
Mike is running some fundraiser
                Limo rides and chi chi games are tops
Sell 85 of whatever it is
                And you might get a lollipop.
Shelley’s working hard to craft
                A chapel to sell hula hoops next week
But doesn’t want to overlap
                Selling tickets to play hide and seek.
Sherri’s got her weekly charity
                To take up collections for
Maybe she’s reaching a little for this one
                It’s for people whose eyebrows are sore.
Booster club jumped in with a skeet shoot
                Josh’s term won, if you care.
The fact his team had friends from Browning Arms
                Shouldn’t be thought of as unfair.
All in all our Temple staff
                Is creative, that’s for sure
They come up with 2 ideas a day
                To get our parents paying more.
But, we’ve drawn the line now for sure
                No more fundraisers in our code
The final straw was the suggestion
                We get pay commodes
Actually, we turned that down
                It’d hurt some in many ways, heck
If we do that Miller might as well
                Just sign over his whole paycheck.
A typical day finds Miller late
                Susan’s crying that’s for sure
And Lachelle looks like she just walked through
                An explosion at a Good Will Store.
Ash is dragging Shaylynn in
                No shoes and uncombed hair
Julie’s somewhere selling bling
                I’m in the crosswalk, so I don’t care.
We do change some each year we last
                In ways we cannot count
But let’s look tonight at ways we’ve changed
                In this year we’re counting out.
It seems each year our chapel music
                Goes up a decibel …or seven
While we old folks put our ear plugs in
                And wonder if there’ll be drums in heaven.
Probably will and we’ll likely find
                If we’re among the seekers
The angel band can’t sing full praises
                Without 18 feet of speakers.
God’s throne will be lit with LED
                Smoke machines behind as customary
And clouds will serve as giant screens
                Ah, yes, heaven’s gone contemporary. 
But, as we listen we notice that
                It’s getting awfully hot up here as well
You don’t suppose this isn’t heaven
                Instead, it’s really…………………..Naw!
It’s probably more like Purgatory
                For every Christian who can’t sing
“The Old Rugged Cross” by heart
                Without words being on a screen.
You’ll know it’s not really heaven if you look
                And see David with his harp leading his own praise team
And you’ll sure know it’s not when you see their name
                “David and the Philistines.”
But, enough of that, let’s come back to our time
                And look at our staff so dear
And see what they’ve been up to as
                They’ve passed our way this year.
Teresa Nava
All have learned Teresa's ways
                She minds the office and doles out passes
But, cross her as some have surely found
                She's more than ready to call you smart ___________  (Well)
But, fortunately, she’s very careful
                Who hears her vent such rage
Last time there was only one 7th grader
                To hear her wild rampage.
But, things worked out through much chagrin
                So as to not upset the masses
But, I did have to spend an hour convincing
                A parent she actually said “smart passes”
Susan’s at her post as always
                Molding little minds
And if that doesn’t keep you up at night
                Your  comprehension’s way behind.
But, she’s still here at TCS
                Plying her strange craft
Turned down a job at the zoo
                Teaching hyena's how to laugh.
She's about to get a graduate degree
                Some of us aren't exactly giving thanks
It's got to knock the prestige of our degrees
                Down several ranks.
In case you ever wondered if God
                Has a sense of humor, well, don’t be dumb
Just take a look at the fact that Lucas
                Won the Homecoming mum.
Susan tried to keep him in tow
                And shoo all girls away
But, alas, this was not to be
                His lips led him astray.   
Lucas seems to have a way
                To rub folks wrong as a rule
Why, he was able to even cause
                Grandpa Jones to lose his cool.
Course, Lucas should have really known
                In  Jones Church of Christ doctrine and all
The unpardonable sin of all the ages
                Is skipping study hall.
  Lucas is at the dating age
                That time can’t be too far
When it happens expect to see Susan
                Riding along in a side car.
She actually said she got her new degree
                To follow Lucas and teach in college, ……. sure
If there’s any justice in this world
                That boy’s got to kill her.
Have you noticed lately Susan’s hair
                Is nicely done each day?
And her manner’s changed some too
                Suspicious, what can we say?
We understand her roving eye
                Has spied a man, we’re glad
Now the question:  is it unethical
                To flirt with your student’s dad?
And in a seasonal side note:
We just learned a startling fact
                And it’s really true we fear
Just ask Susan if she doesn’t still have
                Her Christmas tree up from last year.
She keeps a suitcase in her room
                Contains all her personal things, you’ll find
But we’re not sure that’s what it’s for
                She may have other things in mind.
We expect one day as passing by
                To hear pounding from the case real bad
And, in the hall, you’ll find a tyke
                Asking, “Has anyone seen my dad?”
Each year she asks Santa for a man
                And he brings them plain and fancy
Problem is each one he brings
                Climbs back up the chimney.
And in a seasonal note:
Each year she asks Santa for a man
                And he brings them plain and fancy
Problem is each one he brings
                Climbs back up the chimney.
Shelley's got a chapel now
                Selling yo-yo's to little ones in her care
And wondering why parents would ever question
                The obvious spiritual tie in there.
But when we complained about all the selling
                She got upset and teased us.
For spite, the next chapel she scheduled
                Was "Totally Bananas for Jesus."
You gotta know Jesus is sure compassionate
                As the Bible has often said
If he weren't, He'd have looked at that chapel name
                And surely struck her dead.
Shelley also pushed for martial arts
                Not all parents liked as we shall see
Response included history's dumbest statement
                "Jesus didn't do karate in Gethsemane".
That’s probably true, who can say
                But you can be sure it’d take only minutes
If we knew Jesus was doing it……
                We’d be selling tickets.
So, ninjas now roam our halls
                Headed for their classes
One thing for sure is so clear here
                This is one group Teresa best not call smart___________ (Well….)
Armeggedon came and went
                Then the world ended much the same
Just as unbelieveable for sure
                Football won a game.
Not only one but several more
                Perhaps a connection we do fear.
Did you notice that Miller did no drug testing
                ‘Til football was over for this year
It’s clear from what we did this year
                We couldn’t beat the deaf this time
Not to despair, we’ll work it out
                Next year we’ll try the blind.
Mike’s judgment’s questioned - He got Carla a job
                That keeps her gone – how great that’s been
But then, for reasons yet unknown
                He moved his mother-in-law in.
So, you can laugh at his lack of judgment
                But Doug and I won’t chime in
After all it was us Who hired
                Randy and Kaleb as our night watchmen.
But, at that “move in” thought you can see
                Liz’s husband gasp and shudder
He’d never considered the possibility
                Of living with Liz’s mother.
Kem’s back with us again this year
                Lot’s of experience she does bring
Now, if we could just find out
                What she really thinks about anything.
If you don’t know Kem too well
                Know there’s some hoops through which you’ll jump
Let’s just say you’ll find she’s pretty much
                Temple’s Donald Trump.
Obama knows Kem and knows she can
                Be of great service now to him
Anytime a nation gets out of line
                He simply threatens, “OK, I’m sending Kem”.
The elementary hall's a fearsome place
                Kids run around like ants
And then, as Kem found out one day
                Some of Stapleton’s wear no pants.
We’re not sure what was going on
                In Stapleton’s class so well
But we’re just left to hope and pray
                It wasn’t show and tell.
Some elementary kid going grade by grade
                Could have Stapleton, Espinoza and Porter as she did
Boy, what a truly awesome thought
                That would be some really messed up kid.
The girl would dress like Stapleton
                Laugh like Susan would be our fears
And then after just a year of Porter
                She'd have nothing left between her ears.
We do have a picture of Lachelle that just won’t leave
                And really it probably suits
At that great Judgment where all will stand
                Lachelle will stand next to the Virgin Mary ……………………..wearing cowboy boots.
Porter’s kid watched her all day
                And asked without much warning
Why do you look older in the afternoon
                Than you do in the morning?
There may actually be a cause
                Of Karen’s weird behavior though
She comes to school with bloodshot eyes
                Is that a symptom of anything we know?
If Karen came to school real drunk some day
                We’d have to look her over really well
But, in the end, let’s be honest
                How could we really tell?
But kids do stay alert in the hall
                Mario -Luttrell's on the prowl
She's only run over three kids this year
                Oh wait = one more = hear the howl.
Poor Victoria’s twice been in her sites
                Just listen to her cries
It's so bad that now the poor kid has
                Tread marks on her thighs.
Cheryl’s really quite a site
                In her racy Hover Round chair
But, when’s the last time any saw
                Her Hovering anywhere?
She’s ordered a brand new model we hear
                Will be here pretty soon.
Only concern we really have
                Is about the diesel fumes.
Becky came on board some late
                Really found her job so soft       
The only reason we keep her here
                Is to keep Josh  from running off.
There came that day Becky was gone
                Josh took off and out the door to boot.
I looked out and saw him running
                Miss Luttrell doing a wheelie in pursuit.
But Becky’s kept real busy by Susan
                Reading emails and some to send.
That way Susan can spend her time
                Chasing after men.
Ash took over cheerleading this year
                And seems to do quite well
Except for dealing with her group
                Of cheerleader moms from hell.
One thing, Mark, let’s warn you of
                When looking at your team, don’t tell
But Ash’s cheer squad might outnumber yours
                And outweigh them as well.
Neil’s seen all of this he wants
                And to him we shall be fair
Until  Cheerleading moms attacked
                He had a full head of hair.
One thing, Mark, let’s warm you of
                When looking at your team, don’t tell
But Ash’s cheer squad might outnumber yours
                And outweigh them as well.
Christie has the high school squad
                She took all who came
The only girls that aren’t cheerleaders
                Are the blink, the halt, the lame.
From our viewpoint it is a problem
                It’s embarrassing the way it stands
The football team takes a mini bus
                And the cheerleaders a 3 bus caravan.
But, Ash is such a protective mom
                Wants to always see Sha close by
And She just clings to her mother’s skirt
                Sure, and pigs can fly!
Sha runs wherever on campus
                At times seems almost lost
And, when confronted she’s not above
                Saying, “My Pa-pa is your boss.
Ash does her job with relative ease
                Until drug testing for CDL
Then our drivers seem tempted to
                Tell her to go…………………………………well.
Isaac came home saying a word
                That rhymes real well with witches, alas
Said he got it from Mrs. Boegner
                So we know what she calls girls in her class.
So we have a plan up our sleeves
                We’ll let Teresa and Paula go one on one
With a cursing contest in the gym
                Of course, we’ll sell tickets to see the fun.
It’ll be fun and educational
                What can we really say
At least we’ll then know for sure
                If the “B” word trumps the “A”
Mrs. Morrison holds down the ground
                Between Waldrop and Susan as she can
She must feel a lot like an oasis
                In the middle of a vast wasteland.
Keith Nolley
Keith and Tim keep our whole place
                Running every day
And it’s not easy when they’re being pulled
                Every hour a different way.
But they seem to keep their heads
                Just look what Keith has done
How much better our new elementary AC looks
                Than the older one.
Little kids are convinced it’s a spaceship
                Come from outer space around the sun
And, with some of the teachers they have inside
                You can’t blame them none.
Some feel it’s a hungry alien
                That sucks out human brains
But if it is, it seems to attack
                Just the staff – and causes little pain.
We began a deep investigation
                To see if all was well
Missing brains from our elementary
                I mean, how could we really tell?
But, Keith is great in so many ways
                Don’t give him any static.
Except, perhaps, that he’s married to Janet
                And his mom thinks people live in her attic.
One thing we must do tomorrow
                Is move volleyball poles outside
Yesterday, we lost Donalyn behind one
                They’re dangerous, just too wide.
But, we all know Donalyn comes
                From a planet far, far away
Trying to understand anything she does
                Can only lead to dismay.
We got a Christmas card from Renweb
                Didn’t like what it had to say
“If you let Waldrop anywhere near our system
                We’re throwing all your files away.
Megan does such a great job
                Juggling so many tasks
And generally does it cheerfully
                If anybody asks.
But this week she and Bob did battle
                As she drug a Christmas tree away
There’s a bit of weight differential there
                But I think I’ll take Megan any day.
I’m sorry but when I think of this
                These two fighting so very hard
I can’t shake the picture in my mind
                Of a Cha-wa-wa nipping at a Saint Bernard.
Temple seems this year to have
                Ties to years gone by
Our staff is given olden names
                And we’re not real sure why.
To students, Moore is Dr. Jeckyl and Mr. Hyde
                For her two different ways, we’ve heard
She can call you all kinds of names
                And have honey drip from every word.
Diana has a different roll
                She’s not quite so calm
Sixth graders say they’re convinced
                She must be Hitler’s mom.
West chimes in this naming race
                With a name from World War two.
But we’ll examine that a bit later
                And you be sure we do.
We got Jan a new projector
                Mounted on her wall
To keep her up to date
                With the digital age and all.
She jumped right in and made us think
                With everything she agrees
Until she actually described her new projector as
                The box thingy that shows pictures and movies.
If you see Myra walking by
                And drooling as she goes
Pay no attention, it just means
                She’s been watching Twilight shows.
It’s not becoming for a professional
                To swoon over some movie hunk, right
But she seems to have a teen age crush
On Jacob Black of Twilight
Jacob’s a werewolf on the prowl
                Means if Myra falls in with him
It’s vampires she then has to fear
                They attack, who knows when?
It sounds bad, but not to worry,
Myra needn’t fear
Vampires get very sick on salsa -
                At least that’s what we hear.
Five or our finest had a party
                A Twilight marathon
Julie, Christi, Shelly, were there
                Myra and Stapleton
What can we say to all of this?
                Shoot, they may all be growing hair on their back
If so, we’ll just have to begin calling them
                Temple’s own wolf pack.
Don’t know what reaction we should have
                But one thing’s clearly true
We can say without fear of contradiction
                We don’t give them enough to do.
Husbands of this group beware
                Danger could come soon, you bet
Don’t ever let them give you wolf bane
                Or let their teeth come near your neck.
And if some night you should touch their back
                And feel a hairy mane (as you do)
You’ll know it’s time to get a leash
                And take them to the zoo.
Potts and Waldo were out last week
                Took vacations away from home
Romantic times with their dear husbands –
                No wait, they went alone.
Chesebro’s kids made genetic dinosaurs
                Male if you care
He told them to find a female mate
                We don’t dare ask where.
This task worried Mrs. Stringer -
                Looking for a female dinosaur
At her age she had some fear
                They might come after her.
Lord, forgive me for saying that and be with all the starving pigmies in New Zealand……………………
It fell to Larry to take Jennifer driving
                Just to teach her how
But, there’s no connection with the fact
                He’s on double dose Valium  as of now.
But one thing sure with Larry here
                In this he can’t be beat
When it comes chapel time you will know
                He’ll be the first one  in his seat.
Lachelle and Julie are leaving soon
                We wish them our very best.
They’re off to do a fashion show
                Showing Amish how to dress.
Jul will return to all of us
                After doing her big thing.
And she’ll have coined a brand new phrase
                It’s called “Amish Bling”
These two could cause major trouble
                Just stepping from the car we fear
On look could lead the Amish folks
                To think Armageddon’s here.
While Lachelle’s gone we’ll use no sub
                We have a CD to provide her kid’s care
It just keeps repeating “Stop yelling, Ayden” -
                The kids’ll think she’s still there.
Rhonda Seems a bit more antsy
                No, don’t you laugh
Could be because we hired back
                The one she replaced on staff.
She sure likes to talk a lot
                But there are times she leaves before she’s done
Absolutely, NOTHING interferes with her
                Twice daily Chicken Express run.
She’s eaten so much of their stuff now
                I’ll not telling any fiction
I think she’s actually beginning
                To look a lot like their scared chicken.
Neil heard of Julie’s Twilight marathon
                That it would take all night
Suggested it be a slumber party
                With nighties and the like.
Then he learned who was coming
                And knew how he’d have to class it
Said, “If that happens he’d have to
                Wash his eyes out with battery acid.
Julie really loves her man
                But shows it in a different way
She scheduled her Twilight marathon
                On dear Neil’s birthday.
The big mystery of the year by far
                Is how our pet squirrel met his demise
And bigger yet, Neil’s part in this
                His denials are clearly lies.
He’s always feared from above his door
                The squirrel would jump into his hair
But, if you think about this very much
                There just isn’t enough there.
But squirrels are his least of worries
                As to how he’ll meet his doom
Mrs. Johnson will leave him a bloody pulp
                If he takes one more table from her room.
Stephan and Johnson are furniture hoarders
                Or at least they sure have been
Sometimes it seems they want enough
                So no kids can still get in.
Some people cry at silly things
                That mean so little to us here
Then there’s Christie who cries each time she doesn’t
                Win “Teacher of the Year”.
Hang in there Christie, your time will come
                One must have confidence in oneself
But….if the award ever goes to Miller over you…..
                Then you should probably kill yourself.
Monica was in my first Temple class
                But let’s be very clear,
Could I tell she was bound to be
                Administrative Secretary here?
 I’d like to say that even then
                She behaved, worked hard, generally had a clue
Yeah, I’d like to say that but if I did
                I might die laughing too.
Let’s just say that I could tell
                When I considered all
That she was much more likely to end up soon
                At Fort Worth Juvenile Hall
Raymond’s led a happy life
                Thinking Monica was a pretty good kid
Let’s just say it would be quite different
                If he knew half the things she did.
Last Spring a story hit the news
                About a church way down in Center.
The ladies had taken up pole dancing for the Lord
                Could things get any better?
The next week on the way to Houston
                Take this if you’re a bettor
Glen broke our best bus down – where?
                Just outside of Center.
Transmission gone, we got it fixed
                Next he threw an engine rod, that was neat
So, Shelly,  Please get him a pole dancer for Christmas
                Before he destroys our whole fleet.
C. Smith
Grandpa Jones threw a fit
                Until he got Carrie to join him and Mike
That was really a big mistake
                Now we know what a good math teacher is actually like.
Carrie had Chinese the other day
                Cookie said promotion coming and that thrilled her
She thinks administrator, but no way
                Remember she trained under Miller.
Mark does so well his many jobs
                When needed he’s always handy
A perfect life he seems to lead
                Oh, wait, we forgot he lives with Brandi.
She and Kem have the same affliction
                With which all around have to deal
It’s so hard in any given area
                To know how they really feel.
The stars fell, the sun grew cold
            The fires went out in hell
Just as hard to ever believe
            Stinson got her CDL.
We’re not sure how valid though
            The results really were
We hear she spent a lot of time
            Flirting with the guy who tested her.
But, at least she passed on her first try
            Did very well and so
It would be very embarrassing not to pass first time,
            How about that, Joe?
I watched Jaclyn the other day
                How she talked, acted and all
And I must say we’ve got her placement wrong
                We have to move her to the elementary hall.
It’s an old principle of all health care
                To make all the insane better
It’s always best for all concerned
                To have all inmates together.
It’s 7:30 all staff arrive
                As Temple rules have said
Except many miles away from school
                Miller’s getting out of bed.
If we fine’d staff like we do kids
                For tardies late to school
Chris would be in deep do-do
                He’d lose his whole salary as a rule.
But, he finally comes for work that day
                Drops Blake off for school
Then as sure as the sun does shine,
                Heads right for the stool.
And there he’ll stay glued to the seat
                As the clock goes round a bunch
But, we know for sure he’ll be done in time
                To take a break for lunch.
Stine has our money now
                To plan and look ahead
To keep the school from any problems
                And we think she does, all said.
However, it does strain our faith a bit
                Last week she had to move we know
Out by Friday, but on Thursday
                She still had no place to go.
But, all seems fine right now for her
                She has a place to lay her head.
I guess in Denmark culture now
                That’s called planning well ahead.
It gives us such financial confidence
                To have our books in someone from Europe’s tender care
When it comes to finances they seem to be
                Doing real great over there
Underneath the workroom table
                A trampled body’s hid
It’s the poor soul who tried to get
                To morning coffee before Williams did.
The church got a new sound system
                Couldn’t hear with the old back then
How do we know now when it’s too loud
                Williams’ two hairs sway in the wind.
Ed Gaymon
Ed’s runs the daycare but no longer works
                For us, it is a fact.
The church figured with their track record
                It’d be best if they took it back.
Joanne Lueck
In West’s hall there rests a grave
            You can step over it if your agile
It’s for the last person who dared suggest
            Joanne change the K5 schedule.
If you see Joanne rushing down the hall
            You all know where she’s heading
She’s off to plan another detail
            Of Zac and Mallory’s wedding.
That was really quite a break up
            Facebook, Twitter, Tweet and all
You could’ve split up Santa and Mrs. Claus
            With less trouble overall.
Both moms were our real concern
            What would they have left
There was a time we feared they’d be
            The next feature on WWF
Kim White
Kim’s classroom may receive some fame
                She needs to set up firmer boarders
Last week a call came to request
                To film her class for “Hoarders”.
Luena Wilson
The girl who said she would sacrifice a classmate
            To the Lord one day
Now has Luena for a teacher
            What can we really say?
It’s said Haley switched her target
            To Luena and she could
But there was no excuse next day
            When West staff showed up with kindling wood.
Liz Smith
Liz looks much happier this year
            Just glance at her if you can
Gee, I wonder if it could be because
            She finally trapped a man.
Not that she was desperate at all
            As anyone could see
Course there was that time she asked to advertise
            On the school marquee.
So now she’s settled down and quite
            happy all the while
But, someone tell me if at all tonight
            You’ve seen new husband smile.
Course that may not because of Liz
            Or that in her he’s found a flaw
More likely he’s just realized - poor soul
            Who’s his mother-in-law.
Not that Nance would interfere
            Surely nothing of that kind
But in thinking of her mother-in-law traits
            Does “Everybody Loves Raymond” come to mind?
One thing Liz you’d best get on
            This we’re sure about
In the baby race you’re getting way behind
            The way Bec cranks them out.
Christy LaRue
This year’s gone well for Christy now
            Smooth as warmed up better.
Mainly because she’s stayed away
            From the paper cutter.
I mean how spastic must one be
            When using this complicated tool
To actually cut your finger off
            Just ask Christy for the rule.
So, she’s under tight restrictions now
            Answers to Mrs. Stringer for
The most dangerous thing she can use
            Is blunt scissors and nothing more.
And, if the need cannot be met
            Without the paper cutter, we are told
She has to swallow her pride
            And send a 4 year old.
Kathy Lawrence
Kathy Lawrence’s laying in the floor
            Fainted dead away
Someone suggested she miss her break
            And that’s all it takes any day.
She does have a claim to fame
            Something hard to cure.
Some say they’re sure TV’s Monk learned
            Obsessive compulsive direct from her.
One things certain about our Cathy
            And shows the nerve she’s got
She may be the first teacher to do a lice check
            In the parking lot.
Cathy Martens
Cathy Martens has hobbled in
            Broke her foot in a horrible way
Well, actually it was standing up from a chair
            But, it sounds better the other way.
Knowing Cathy one thing’s for sure
            As a result of her falling
Before long, as we have no doubt
            Her lawyer will come calling.
But, I’ve known Cathy forever now
            How long, if you care
Let’s just say we met when Mrs. Stringer
            Still actually had red hair.
OK, West I’ll tell you what
                If you’ll pay me enough for sure
I’ll not mention to Leddie Martin
                How you associate Mussolini’s name with her.
Staff Kids
Our staff kids are a shining light
                The very best in our school.
Well, there are times – for sure –
                But, I’m speaking as a general rule.
Avery seems grounded for much of life
                Likely the parents with whom he’s laden
Then there’s his younger brother-
                Well, we’d probably best not even mention Ayden.
Isaac calls girls (rhymes with witches)
                As often as he can
And Blake when I corrected him
                Asked, “Do you know who I am?”
But my grandkid is next to perfect
                So let’s not include her here.
Except for telling a kid where he could go
                And throwing salt in the copier.
The salt we can’t really explain
                But in telling the kid, a question raises
We’re sending her down to Teresa
                Who seems to know some other catchy phrases.
Zack’s great except for girlfriend troubles
                And the surgery he talked about.
He brought his bone here in a jar
                And grossed the whole school out.
But, I’d better stop here and now
                Before I become unkind
Considering we have an administrator
                Who still wipes his kid’s behind.
We could go on about what happens
            At good old TCS
But settle your nerves, we’ll stop here
            And let you imagine all the rest.
We’ve really had a super year
            With all the things that’s come
And we can praise the Lord with joy
            When all is said and done.
Most of all we thank the Lord
            For each of you tonight
You bless us each and every day
            You’re precious in his sight.
In spite of what’s been said please know
            You are a shining light
And we know all that Temple is
            Is due to you who’re here tonight.
We love each one for what you give
            Even more for your heart.
And thank the Lord for all these years
            He’s let me be a part.
So, thanks to all who give their lives
            Our jobs do not get done
Without us knowing all success
            Goes To Him and then to each and every one.